Bola the virgin is pregnant!

Bola is a 21-year-old, final year English student at the University of Eastern Nigeria. She is from a very Christian background. Her dad is a pastor and her mom the church mommy. She is the first child in a family of 4; she has, one brother and three sisters. Both parents are very busy so she kind of takes care of her younger siblings ages 19 to 12.

Bola is a good girl; she is in a steady relationship with Akin. She met Akin during one of their fellowship outreaches. Akin at that time was 21 years old, a final year engineering student but he has since graduated. Akin wooed Bola for over a year, promising to marry her after she graduates. While they were courting, he promised her they would not have sex till they get married. She never slept over at his place even when he graduated, got a good job, rented a beautiful apartment in town and occasionally begged her to spend the night at his place. Over time, they got very comfortable with each other, once in a while they kissed, and ‘played’ with each other – heavy petting. But more often than not they just enjoyed each other’s company.
Akin was Bola’s escape from the routine grind she faced at home, he was her go-to person when things didn’t go well, and he was her family. Her siblings all knew Akin, called him uncle Akin. He gave them pocket money and occasionally visited them in their schools. Everyone knew them as a ‘couple’ but for the parents.

With all these Akin began to coerce Bola to just ‘touch’ him, after all, they were getting married soon; this caused Bola a lot of pain and concern. After so much pressure, complaints of having ‘blue balls’ syndrome and threats by Akin to leave the relationship, for fear of losing such a good man, Bola finally consented to allow him to play around her vagina without penetrating.

Over time she began to enjoy it and would let him go in just a bit. They both believed they were not having sex, so contraception was out of the question except the withdrawal method. Life was good, just that Bola felt a lot of guilt after these escapades, but Akin was there to reassure her nothing happened.
Then boom! Bola noticed her breasts were fuller than normal! She paid no attention to it, in fact, she was glad until she checked her dairy and noticed nothing written under period for over three months! Panic set in! But she said to herself ‘I am still a virgin! He never went all the way!’ she summoned up some courage and went to a lab for a pregnancy test.
Kata-kata burst when he told Akin she thought she was pregnant! Akin was livid! He called her a prostitute and pretender. Told her to find the father of her bastard child and on and on. He told her never to talk to him again or visit him. Bola begged and begged, she cried out her eyes, Akin just shoved her out of his way and stormed out telling her he didn’t want to see her when he got back.
Bola almost died from shock and a broken heart! Where would she go? Her parents will disown her, the shame, disappointment and all. What about the fellowship? What of her parents’ church members? Should she run away from home? What of school?

Can Partial Penetration Result In Pregnancy?

Yes, partial penetration can lead to pregnancy! Even ejaculating outside but near the vagina can cause a girl to be pregnancy! Though, the chances are slim pregnancy can occur without penetration. All that is required is for sperm to fertilize an egg. This unusual method of getting pregnant depends, on the time of the month for the woman and the ability of the sperm to swim against all the odds! Did you know that insertion of a finger with viable sperms into the vagina can result in the fertilization of any mature egg waiting in the fallopian tube? This event is possible as sperm can stay alive in an enabling cervical environment for three to five days – waiting for the egg to be released.

Possibility of Pregnancy from Partial Penetration

The chances of pregnancy from partial penetration, may not be as high as when ejaculation occurs during sexual intercourse. The presence of sperm anywhere near a woman’s vagina can lead to pregnancy if the woman is fertile. Contact between the vaginal area and the penis even without penetration can introduce sperm cells into the vagina. Often, sperm cells make their way to the vagina during foreplay. This process is possible due to free sperm cells from residual semen during such moments. Remaining sperm may exist in a man’s genital tract if he has previously ejaculated and has not urinated after the ejaculation. Urination can cause sperms in such semen to be washed out.
The presence of sperms on the vaginal opening or its surroundings may lead to pregnancy even when the hymen is still intact.
The risk of gestation through partial penetration or even ejaculation on the vaginal area is preventable by using barriers such as condoms.

In Bola’s case, she got pregnant from the heavy petting. Young ladies, beware, there is nothing like blue balls! Don’t let these young men deceive you. You can show appreciation in different ways other than sex, try not to find yourself in situations that make you so vulnerable. It is okay, even natural to want to have sex, but the onus is on you to have control over it. But if you most have sex, please make it your choice not by force, protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases, HIV/AIDs, unwanted pregnancies using condoms.
Did you know there is a link between cancer of the cervix, early sex and multiple sexual partners? Please make informed decisions.